Asking for help...

The funny thing about most horse people I know is that we are both good and bad at asking for help. Asking for help covering chore shifts? Sure no problem. Asking for help because we're injured in some manner and really should have help? Nope, not happening.

Why on earth are we so stubborn?

I know many horse people that have some form of chronic pain that we just ignore and push through until it is so incredibly bad that we're pretty much incapable of doing anything. I'm sure for some it's a pride thing. For me, I just feel bad asking for help with tasks I should be able to do myself, it makes me feel like I am inconveniencing someone else. I know, logically, that this isn't positive thinking and really is something I need to work on. I am trying, but it's still so hard.

I've managed back pain problems since I was in high school (yes, I know, I was and still am "too young" to have back problems) and have thankfully been in good space for the past couple years. That is until last week when something in my lumbar area decided to throw out the script and make it's own choices. I've been dealing with the worst back and nerve pain I have ever felt since. Of course being a holiday and holiday weekend, I was unable to go to the chiropractor until today. I did my best to manage the pain and adapted how I was working to make sure I didn't hurt it further. I didn't ask for help though.

This morning while cleaning stalls and thinking about how badly I felt like crying over this, I remembered back in the summer when I found a note Nina had written. Nina wrote this note many years ago when she had broken her wrist in the middle of winter. She had broken her dominant one as well, which means she either wrote this note with her non dominant hand, or with her aching one. Either way, her usually flawless script was a wee bit wobbly. It was a list of things she had learned from breaking her wrist. One of items on this list was ask for help.

I thought about that note all morning. Nina also struggled to ask for help until she had no other choice but to ask. Even her lovely, wobbly script on that note is proof that she did not like to ask for help. I suppose I'm just the same as I lay here writing this (because sitting is the most painful position) and thinking about how I will modify my routine to get the work done without having someone else do the work for me.

Oh well. I guess us stubborn horse people are not a dying breed!